Go Figure 2
(These titles are a shameless attempt to cosy up to my American readers. But it's a dangerous game. At this rate I'll be saying "Do the math" without an 's'.)
How rude of me to start parenthetically. Anyway, I've just watched England thrash Northern Ireland 4-0 in the World Cup qualifier. It was even more blissful if you forgot they were playing a crap team and pretended that N.Ireland were Argentina.
If you're thinking 'he must be talking about soccer', then you never watch football. And if you're thinking 'does he mean Association Football?' there's even less hope for you.
Are there any other sports that have more than one name, one for those who follow them and one for those who don't? ('Boring shit' for 'cricket' doesn't count).
Joe Cole was Man of the Match. However in his post-match interview he said:
"Old Trafford's a big pitch, so we knew they were going to tire."
I had always assumed that all league and international pitches were the same size. If not, then this is most unfair. So if you'll excuse me I'm now going to write a strong letter to FIFA.